‘‘Good evening sports fans and welcome to the Blood Bowl for tonight’s contest. You join a capacity crowd, packed with members of every race from across the known world, all howling like banshees in anticipation of tonight’s game. Oh, and yes, there are some actual banshees… Well, kick-off is in about twenty minutes time, so we’ve just got time to recap on the rules of the game before battle starts. Your match commentators for tonight are Jim Johnson and myself, Bob Bifford. Evening, Jim!’’
‘‘Thank you, Bob! Well, good evening, and boy, are you folks in for a great night of top-class sporting entertainment! But first of all, for those of you at home who are unfamiliar with the rules, here’s how the game is played.’’
‘‘As you know, Blood Bowl is an epic conflict between two teams of heavily-armoured and quite insane warriors. Players pass, throw or run with the ball, attempting to get it to the other end of the pitch, the End Zone. Of course, the other team must try and stop them, and recover the ball for their side. If a team gets the ball over the line into the opponent’s End Zone it’s called a touchdown; the team that scores the most touchdowns by the end of the match wins the game, and are declared Blood Bowl Champions!”
“Lets go match side with our roving reporter Jon Moleson and Chris Kalamari for the commentary”
The teams are Turnlee Titans, a bunch of Rats and Renurgitated, a bunch of… well I’m not sure what they are. They look humanoid except for that one with the mouth in its belly.
Lets face it fans were only interested in Touchdowns or injuries.
We don’t have to wait long for it – Renurgitated draw first blood on the first round and KO one of the Titans Linemen.
The titans retaliate beautifully with a fumble throw, followed by some incredible skill KO as their thrower tries to dodge out of a tackle zone.
Round 4 rolls round, and one of the Renurgitated’s warriors KO’s himself from a block on a Gutter Runner. He looks a lot like a red hulk.
Round 5 and one of the Titans has done the impossible, I believe he has Killed that pestigor. Its incredible, a rat killing a nurgle pesitgor, its incredible, impossible, unbelievable Chris….
Never mind – hes regenerated and is fine.
Its push push push from Nurgle and the skaven… until
Round 8 – there’s a gutter runner with the ball – hes running, I believe he has done it Chris.
He made the touch down. Score 1 to Titans.
Half time, my favourite bit – bring on the Cheerleaders…. although with Nurgle and Skaven I’m not sure I want to watch.
Second half round 1,
Nurgle off to a good start they fumble the catch.
Round 3 Renurgitated manage to KO another Lineman and formed a cage, Titans Lineman manage to fall over and gets stunned.
Round 4 One of the Skaven Gutter runners takes time out of the game to visit with fans coutesy of Renurgitated.It’s good when the players press the flesh – of course the fans are mostly kicking the players heads in.
Round 5 and 6 the cage moves down the pitch slowly grinding its way towards the Titans endzone.
Round 7 some more flesh pressing from the titans, Gutter runners and Lineman alike – helped into the crowd by Renurgitated. One of the nurgle warriors also Ko’s another thrower. Have the titans got any players left on the pitch?
Renurgitated’s pestigor has the ball and goes for it towards the endzone, then makes it into the endzone but fumbles the GFI and drops the ball in the endzone.
The Titans Blocker grabs the ball hamfisted and hurls it at his teammate. Well we think that’s where it was supposed to go.
Nurgles last push results a fumbled throw into the end zone, they like getting the crowd involved – they have even given them the ball now.
I’d call this game Chris. Looks like its all over.
Turnlee Titans 1 – Renurgitated 0
How about that then Jim and Bob any words?
“That’s great guys but you do know that’s not the first game…. you’ve just described the friendly they had.”
“That’s right Jim, I thought the first score was 1-1 a score draw. ”
If your still with us – thanks for staying.
Thats all from John Moleman And Chris Kalamari